The Home Coming and the day after.

Early in the morning of the Home Coming party, last minute cleaning and preparations are being made to the garden and the home.
Shan and Udari are due to arrive home at 6pm, there will be a welcoming of the bride to the parents in laws home where she will live with her husband Shan until they are able to live independently.  This is a tradition in Sri Lankan Culture.
It's hot and humid and the sky looks as if it will open at any monent,  Rain is the last thing that's needed.  The moving of furniture, cleaning have been completed, the table and chairs have arrived and the caterers have delivered some of their equipment. 
I've worked as hard as anyone today to help with the Home Coming.  I've washed countless numbers of dishes, swept the kitchen floor so many times I've lost count and moved furniture so that the seating can be arranged to suit the occasion keeping in mind that the newly married couple are the centre of attentiion.
An undercover area has been errected and two collapsable awnings have been erected in the back garden and another in the front garden.  Tables and chairs are arranged and the chairs have been decorated with wide red ribbons.  Red being the colour of the Home Coming even down to the Sari that Udari is to wear.
The day has gone very quickly and it's time to decorate with fresh water lily's.  There's a special way of preparing them and I join the girls in doing that.  It's easy to pick up and I'm quickly flattening the petals to leave a pod in the middle.
Time's moving swiftly now and some of the family member are arriving.  There are already 18 people here now, I need to shower and dress along with all of them.   It's a hive of activity now with so many people buzzing around and the couple to arrive within a short space of time.
Within what seems minutes, we're all asked to assemble in the front area of the house as the parents wait at the front door for the arriving couple. 
The tradition is that Shan's family already be present at the house and Udari's family follow her to her new home in a procession. 
The decorated car arrives and Shan steps out all splendid in his shiny white suit and then he's followed by Udari who is dressed in a vibrant red and jewelled sari.  She is truly beautiful.
They are welcomed into the home by Raja and his wife where a traditional welcome is performed and then they are seated.  Lot's of photo's are being taken by the photographers and the brides family are seated at the tables and it's tradition that the grooms family serve them cool drinks and sweets.  I also assist with this, it's such a nice tradition.
Very soon the young couple are asked to take their first meal in the grooms home together and that's followed by the brides family and then the grooms family.
It's also tradition that the men do their drinking in a different location to where the women are. In this case, it's upstairs in a rooftop court yard area.
Very soon it's time for the speeches.  A member of Shan's family speaks about many things pertaining to married life and then it's the Udari's families turn.  Again an older member of the family is selected and he also speaks of the responsibilities of marriage and the sacrifices that each set of parents has made for their children.  Udari at this point is in tears and her mother also.
What I didn't understand was that after the speeches, the brides family would leave and tht this is usually an upsetting moment for both mother and daughter.
Very shortly afterward, I'm invited to join the men of the grooms family upstairs for a drink.  Sri Lankan women don't usually drink alcohol so I'm the lone woman amongst 30 men.  Fortunately I know most of them and if I don't, they know of me so that makes it easier fo rme.
There's music playing downstairs and everyone is enjoying themselves and then the time arrives for most of the family members to go home.  Some of them live an hours drive away and they have work the following day.
I join the family in bidding them farewell but for me, I am saying good bye because I won't see most of them for some time as I'll be leving Sri Lanka within the week.  It's certainly an emotional time. I've come to know them well, appreciate their culture and genuinly feel that we are all very good friends.
Very soon, there is just the immediate family at home and those who will spend the night.  I'm dead beat but know that if we don't do a little cleaning before we go to bed, we have to face the mess in the morning.  We gather the glasses, put the food scraps into bags and generally remove anything that will blow away in the middle of the night if the wind picks up overnight.
It's after 1pm now and I'm dead beat.  All I want to do is have a shower and go to sleep.  I feel that over the past week I've not slept well and with the stress of the wedding and home coming over, tonight I'll sleep the sleep of the dead.
It was a wonderful event and I'm very glad that I was invited to take part.  Over the years I have been visiting Sri Lanka, Raja, his wife Daya and their two sons Shan and Pulasthi have accepted me into their family life.
It is such a wonderful experience and I am very fortunate to have been given this opportunity. 
In life, we experience many things that have huge impacts on our lives.  My visits to Sri Lanka, living with this family have been wonderful and I can only hope that they enjoy having me with them as much as I enjoy being with them.